The Lost Being Lost

I lived my last two weeks quite an empty way, i lost one of my most loyal companion. I keep listening to my cabuk phone and Sein, replacing that companion. I thought the problem is finally over, once my brother has decided to send me his Zen, but nope, another problem arised. The news leaked, by myself accidentally, to my father who is allergic with pejabat pos. So the chance of me getting the replace is as low as my chance performing haji this year. I think i should force my sister to marry a postmaster, or my brother to marry a kerani jabat pos to break this weird tradition of my family -no posting out. Seriously i envy those whose their dads fedex a parcel of anchovies after only 5 minutes of whining. My dad, he can listen to my whining for a week non-stop, still he resists himself from sending any parcel. And now the situation is getting worse, he even stops my brother's noble intention.

Should i play the little devil? Buying the zune hd online using his plastic money. Seriously i can't stand living without an MP3 player.(since it's mp3 plus another p which is initial for player, i call it mp4, yet still there is someone who is restless with it and i celebrate it tonight). I wonder how did i live my first year, without owning that stuff. It's like the immunity, you live with the microbs and you get the disease, you don't live with the microbs then you get the allergic. Ape yang same nye labu?

I want to go to Amman tomorrow to find the temporary replace for my taik telinga contributor, but i don't know who should i ask for the company. If only that lower-than-Perai-level civilisation city is within 30 minutes bas ride, i would have gone alone. Everybody seems to have their own hectic schedule which i prefer not to butt in, i've been responsible for some damages already for butting in too much. AArggh now i need not only a maid, but also a maid with a car and driving license.

Oh speaking on behalf of driving license, i have yet to recover from my trauma, i lost my confidence in driving. Last summer break, i drove Kembara beside a speeding two-layer bus, and the next thing i did was giving signal, and went into a vase factory. Now i wonder am i really the same one who drifted along the tiga ratuih area in 2006? i always sleep soundly in moving vehicle with exception to those with -cycle suffix, but after the accident, i always wake up with slight tachy after a mild brake. My daredevil spirit must have left me and follow another during that accident, and a scaredy-cat spirit replaced it.

I'm losing myself more and more after reading medicine. Now i even suck at math, my most valuable asset back then.

Oh tuhan what with this down feeling..i should be grateful after all. I'm getting myself a new mp3 player soon enough by hook or by crook or by kook.

ps: i measure the civilisation from the tech view. Like, you cant get an xperia in amman, but you can get it, with the lowest price in Malaysia, in amende-name-tah chinese computer shop in bukit mertajam. Tak kira ar barang seludup ke, bayar kastam ke, asal ori ngan murah.

ps2: ohohoho, it's friday the 13th laaa..so please, let someone ask me for a shopping trip in amman tomorrow. ayat yang tidak ada kesinambungan fakta antara satu sama lain<-- my dad must be proud of me if he read this, he's an SPM marker for BM.

ps3: i've been trotting to and fro in my room, then running to kitchen, thinking who should i ask to go to amman tomorrow.

psp: ok, the truth, i am so introvert i dont know how to make the first step, so the possibility i CAN go shopping in amman tomorrow is about 7%. freak.