LiveStrong

Do you remember there were times when that rubber hand-bands are the trend? no point to it, but worth this space because of the live strong message. Be strong. I never tempted to that thing, because abah told me only keling wear that.

At this age and with what i've been through, i think i'm way past the phase of  "she ignored me, and i'm hurt."  but i'm not that strong. 2 very close friends stop talking to me altogether for more than a year. i've been whining ever since, and i hate it. normal person will talk it out, but i have the courage of a sloth, so..

i really thought time would heal, and i was wrong. this time, in this situation, time makes it worse. especially to someone who i see almost everyday. and to someone i dont see and i cant reach everyday, i actually forgot about you, until another someone leaked it out that you are still alive, safe and kicking and graduated and riching and fattening with my brother. oh why in the world i use you, it's not like he's reading it anymore.

it hurts to see people who used to be very close to me, end up moving on hating and very keen on forgetting me. oh yes, i feel the animosity. but measuring it up from their points, maybe they feel the same. maybe they dont.

i should have broke my amygdala, specific on area storing all memory about them, because it hurts too much.but in the same time i dont want not to know them, life would have been dull without them. irrelevant ambiguity.

keep trying A, and live strong. whining wont sell the stock.

ps: i feel like they whispered to me, " No i wont wait forever" , just like in the Signal Fire. and now that forever is up. but i'll keep trying, until the time i really fail.

ps2: Man i forgot. initially i want to write a birthday entry for ku apek (my sister), it's her sweet seventeenth. curse this mood swing. but still, footnote still counts. happy birthday, ku apek. i'll write you a full birthday entry once you really read my blog. I pray for your life to be the best and blessed, anywhere, everytime. and maybe, smarter, since you are the dumbest in our family.